June 2009
9 posts
Kirk Cameron is an idiot. →
Teenie: It's hot in here.
Munk: That's cause you spent all that energy trying to put your fist in my butt.
Teenie: Trying?
“The first iPhone was more eagerly anticipated than Jesus Christ returning with...”
– Cracked.com
"Insurers continue to put their profits above... →
May 2009
21 posts
5 "Feminist" Pop Stars that Should Stop Making...
I’m not a ladies man, or anything. Nor would I ever consider myself the self-appointed male spokesman for women’s rights. But I do believe in the advancement of women and the refinement of their role in our society (whatever that means). Women, let’s face it, have been dealt a mediocre hand in our world, and I feel proud that I can do my part to end the madness by marrying a...
T: Do you remember the group that sang that song, "Barbie Girl"?
M: Uhh.. Aqua-something. Aqualung? Aquaman? Aqua Net?
T: Umm... no.
M: Aqua Jet?...
T: You need to stop now.
M: ... I think that's a brand of douche.
T: Whatever their name is, they're getting back together.
M: Why? Why?
T: I don't know. I didn't do it.
M: What a great world we're leaving to our children, huh Teenie? Where mediocrity holds sway...
One day left
It’s raining and thundering pretty hard outside. Should I be on my computer? Probably not. But I’m already done packing, so I have nothing else to do.
The rain always reminds me of her. One time, we went to Dove Park at night and sat in one of the dugouts and talked for a while. At one point in our conversation, I mentioned how much I love rain, and thatI’d love some day to...
“I love digital cameras. Because they enable you to reminisce immediately.”
– Demetri Martin
Sometimes, parents are really, really stupid. →
"Our" country?
So I read this article today. In case you don’t want to commit to clickage, I’ll give you the skinny: there was a parade in Homestead, and some Confederate flags were displayed, and some of the black folk in attendance got pissed. Then the NAACP petitioned the school board to keep students and school bands from appearing in future events where the Confederate flag was to be...
I miss my fiancée
That’s nothing new, of course. But every day it seems as though I miss her more. Every day, her absence weighs more heavily on me. So it feels new to me.
Did you know when we first met, all we did was argue the whole night? And let me tell you something… this girl can argue. I never in my life thought I’d meet my intellectual equal when it came to arguing about pointless...
History Swings on a Sandwich
A short history lesson. Those of you reading this who graduated high school (and this is the internet, so that’s probably not a large percentage) should remember that WWI began with the assassination of Franz Ferdinand, Archduke of Austria and second runner-up for the prestigious Marc Award for Most Awesome Moustache in History.
Look at that thing. I’m frightened.
The reasonings...
Coming soon..
I’m not terribly good at keeping blogs updated, but I’ll try. I’m sure my fiancée will help me with that.
How much of history rides on a mere sandwich? Way more than you’d think. Details soon…
“The moral panic started like many of them do: with a death and an idiot.”
– Geoff Shakespeare (Cracked.com)
